It was cold, the breeze from the open window flew throughout the room. It was two in the morning and still, I couldn’t get any sleep. My musing seems to be boundless. What was I thinking? I told myself. A different personality, as most people who knew me would say. I’m cognizant of the tendencies of people in judging characters, they say that I am mysterious as compared to those of my age bracket or to those a little years older than me.

Mysterious or strange, I whispered. Could it be that I still let myself held captive by my past? If that’s the case, then I’d kneel in front of my oppressors rather than having my font of hope to be demolished. But I won’t allow them to do so. I took my blanket off me, and walked towards the lavatory. I washed my face, and look at the mirror asking myself, “Do you really know who you are?”

Foolish as it seemed to be, I regret what I’ve said; after all, we knew ourselves better among others. I went back to bed, and tried to get some shuteye. Looking at the ceiling, I wonder what my life would be in the near future. I kept thinking of the careers which I will have to pursue. I want to become an artist, an electronics and communications engineer, and a lawyer; however, I must keep in mind that formal education is essential in achieving my goals.

Time slipped by so fast. The night seemed to be endless as I checked the time from my mobile phone. It’s three-thirty in the morning. I said to myself; "My fellow Filipinos are still asleep while I’m still awake—not because I work at a call center just like my mother, but rather my mind was restless." Ever since, it was my mom who raised me alone. I haven’t met nor heard anything from my dad. Leaning my back against the frigid wall, I imagined if my mom decided to marry my dad back then; would I still be the same person as I am today?

An only child, and an illegitimate son, I don’t consider my state as a nuisance but rather a gift. A blessing which I should be thankful for. That even if I wasn’t given the opportunity to be nurtured by my father, God gave me knowledge and talents in exchange. A chilly breeze passed by, It was then that I realized that I left the window open. Before I completely shut the window closed, I glanced at the sky and something caught my eye. With a smile on my face, I went back to bed as I sang to myself into sleep.


“I'm that star up in the sky
I'm that mountain peak up high
Hey, I made it
I'm the world's greatest
And I'm that little bit of hope
When my back's against the ropes
I can feel it
I'm the world's greatest”