storya medyo mahaba nga lng, sorry in advance
medyo crush ko sya when it comes sa personality ksi fun and bully sya
the 2 of us used to talk before on discord about anything or related in-game while we're playing along with her friends, and i used to help/carry anyone/newbie inside the guild
bali apprentice ko sya sa bagong game since former officer/game-guru ako (im a former guild leader(2013) and founder ng isang group that we merge on other guild) and isa sa mga nag hhandle ng pinoy community thru our guild (sna wla mkabasa na kakilala ko d2 kundi yari wahahaha
)
lumipas yung araw bali quit nko sa game that time, but still madalas prin kme mag ka chat. sometimes she consult on me, asking for advice about her former bf that she broke up.
lumipas ang mga nag daang araw and suddenly fall in love with her (i still dunno why it happen) without even realizing na hindi dapat which is lately ko na na realized
dumating sa point na she ask me that i wouldn't notice, if my gusto ba ako sknya (actually yung way nya is sinabi nya sken na my crush daw sya sken and suddenly nung hindi ako umamin and tumawa lng ako ksi alam ko nman very impossible if may gusto sken since madami boys na nakapaligid sknya (thats what i think about her) she told me na kind of like just a survey lng and para mahuli nya yung taong may gusto sknya) feeling ko nakakahalata ksi sya, but ang plan ko lng ksi muna is makipag friend sknya
dumating sa point na umamin nko sknya and tell everything, ksi wala na ako choice kasi my karibal ako that time which is classmate nya (my kirot ee tengene). its a 50/50 for me so kya ko ginawa un if ever man na basted ako atleast nasabi ko pra ndi msyadong masakit sken
later on, she told me everything. my gusto din daw sya sken and sometimes hindi nya maintindihan sarili nya bkt daw sya comportable kausap ako and hindi daw nya alam bkt nag sselos daw sya dun sa ibang katambayan nmin sa voice chat ko since yung iba girl din (kasalanan ng recruiter ko to ee
)
time passed, as usual, nag uusap prin kme sa voice chat at madalas mag ka chat sa fb. yung tipong nag level up from being just a friend and gusto nya ligawan ko daw sya sa bahay nila along with their parents and i planned sna mkipag meet this july then after that i'll do it, gusto nya na daw ako mkita personally at ma hug
time passed, suddenly nag bago sya nung nag start na yung pasukan, dati pag badmood sya natitiis nya ako, ngaun wla khit chat wla pag tinanong mo wla (sigh*), pag ni chat mo bz daw sya and one time inaway ko sya then sbi nya wag muna ngaun dhil problemado daw sya sa school etc etc, i told him nman na mag focus muna sya sa study nya and 2days kme hindi nag chat that time after nung sinabi nya sken na mas gusto daw muna mag focus sa study nya rather than having a bf, kasi nahihirapan na daw sya ulet mag tiwala. then later nag sorry sya skin na badmood lng daw sya that time
later on, nag open up sya about sa ex nya na, suddenly bigla daw nya na miss yung kakulitan nya at pagiging malambing although hindi na nag pparamdam sknya and i give my thoughts then one day, nag sorry sya sken cuz she think na gusto parin daw nya yung ex nya and hindi muna daw sya mag bbf dahil wala na daw sya tiwala sa lalaki, and she dont want to pretend that shes happy
then that day nag paalam ako sknya but before pa i told her na mag iintay ako even years passed nung time na inaway ko sya, from my own perspective ayaw ko pilitin yung tao, khit masakit. wala nman ako magagawa ksi mindset nya un. im just supporting her desicion thats all. alam ko nman na paiba iba isip ng babae (kainis).
after that promises we exchange and mga sinabi nya sken that im unique dhil mrun pa plang tao na ganito, and sometimes i ask her ksi feeling ko ang weird ko. i told her ksi na if ever siguro na mag ka gf ako siguro sya na yung forever ko unless i-giveup nya ako which is my own mindset, and when that happen for sure i'll be a loner again for many years since im kind of like having a hard time na maattract sa tao. someone told me na asexual daw ako, and for me ksi honestly ndi ksi tlaga ako na aattract sa itsura maybe the reason why its rare for me na magkagusto sa tao
kinabukasan habang papasok ako sa work kusa tumutulo yung luha ko habang nag mmotor ako (putek yan
), i planned na kalimutan sya kso, yung promise ko sknya parang sobrang hirap i-break (parang nen lng ni kurapika na once i break my promise i'll self destruct), my time na pag gising ko sa umaga, sya yung naaalala ko and 5mins later i realized na wala na pala sya, feeling ko kulang yung araw ko (parang gusto ko i umpog yung ulo ko sa pader) then bigla pumasok sa isip ko na what if, i'll wait for her and courting her again. bali plan ko imeet sya sa ESGS event moa sa october since she told me na pumunta daw ako before pa
bigla 2loy ako nawalan ng tiwala sa babae, sa isip ko prang, ndi nlng. why wasting my time sa tao kung masasaktan ka lng kung nanjan nman lhat ng things na gusto ko gawin
and now i feel depressed after what happened, i feel like i lose all of my interest on everything, gusto ko ulet bumalik sa previous hobby ko, bkt gnun 
medyo crush ko sya when it comes sa personality ksi fun and bully sya
the 2 of us used to talk before on discord about anything or related in-game while we're playing along with her friends, and i used to help/carry anyone/newbie inside the guild
bali apprentice ko sya sa bagong game since former officer/game-guru ako (im a former guild leader(2013) and founder ng isang group that we merge on other guild) and isa sa mga nag hhandle ng pinoy community thru our guild (sna wla mkabasa na kakilala ko d2 kundi yari wahahaha
)lumipas yung araw bali quit nko sa game that time, but still madalas prin kme mag ka chat. sometimes she consult on me, asking for advice about her former bf that she broke up.
lumipas ang mga nag daang araw and suddenly fall in love with her (i still dunno why it happen) without even realizing na hindi dapat which is lately ko na na realized
dumating sa point na she ask me that i wouldn't notice, if my gusto ba ako sknya (actually yung way nya is sinabi nya sken na my crush daw sya sken and suddenly nung hindi ako umamin and tumawa lng ako ksi alam ko nman very impossible if may gusto sken since madami boys na nakapaligid sknya (thats what i think about her) she told me na kind of like just a survey lng and para mahuli nya yung taong may gusto sknya) feeling ko nakakahalata ksi sya, but ang plan ko lng ksi muna is makipag friend sknya
dumating sa point na umamin nko sknya and tell everything, ksi wala na ako choice kasi my karibal ako that time which is classmate nya (my kirot ee tengene). its a 50/50 for me so kya ko ginawa un if ever man na basted ako atleast nasabi ko pra ndi msyadong masakit sken
later on, she told me everything. my gusto din daw sya sken and sometimes hindi nya maintindihan sarili nya bkt daw sya comportable kausap ako and hindi daw nya alam bkt nag sselos daw sya dun sa ibang katambayan nmin sa voice chat ko since yung iba girl din (kasalanan ng recruiter ko to ee
)time passed, as usual, nag uusap prin kme sa voice chat at madalas mag ka chat sa fb. yung tipong nag level up from being just a friend and gusto nya ligawan ko daw sya sa bahay nila along with their parents and i planned sna mkipag meet this july then after that i'll do it, gusto nya na daw ako mkita personally at ma hug
time passed, suddenly nag bago sya nung nag start na yung pasukan, dati pag badmood sya natitiis nya ako, ngaun wla khit chat wla pag tinanong mo wla (sigh*), pag ni chat mo bz daw sya and one time inaway ko sya then sbi nya wag muna ngaun dhil problemado daw sya sa school etc etc, i told him nman na mag focus muna sya sa study nya and 2days kme hindi nag chat that time after nung sinabi nya sken na mas gusto daw muna mag focus sa study nya rather than having a bf, kasi nahihirapan na daw sya ulet mag tiwala. then later nag sorry sya skin na badmood lng daw sya that time
later on, nag open up sya about sa ex nya na, suddenly bigla daw nya na miss yung kakulitan nya at pagiging malambing although hindi na nag pparamdam sknya and i give my thoughts then one day, nag sorry sya sken cuz she think na gusto parin daw nya yung ex nya and hindi muna daw sya mag bbf dahil wala na daw sya tiwala sa lalaki, and she dont want to pretend that shes happy
then that day nag paalam ako sknya but before pa i told her na mag iintay ako even years passed nung time na inaway ko sya, from my own perspective ayaw ko pilitin yung tao, khit masakit. wala nman ako magagawa ksi mindset nya un. im just supporting her desicion thats all. alam ko nman na paiba iba isip ng babae (kainis).
after that promises we exchange and mga sinabi nya sken that im unique dhil mrun pa plang tao na ganito, and sometimes i ask her ksi feeling ko ang weird ko. i told her ksi na if ever siguro na mag ka gf ako siguro sya na yung forever ko unless i-giveup nya ako which is my own mindset, and when that happen for sure i'll be a loner again for many years since im kind of like having a hard time na maattract sa tao. someone told me na asexual daw ako, and for me ksi honestly ndi ksi tlaga ako na aattract sa itsura maybe the reason why its rare for me na magkagusto sa tao
kinabukasan habang papasok ako sa work kusa tumutulo yung luha ko habang nag mmotor ako (putek yan
), i planned na kalimutan sya kso, yung promise ko sknya parang sobrang hirap i-break (parang nen lng ni kurapika na once i break my promise i'll self destruct), my time na pag gising ko sa umaga, sya yung naaalala ko and 5mins later i realized na wala na pala sya, feeling ko kulang yung araw ko (parang gusto ko i umpog yung ulo ko sa pader) then bigla pumasok sa isip ko na what if, i'll wait for her and courting her again. bali plan ko imeet sya sa ESGS event moa sa october since she told me na pumunta daw ako before pabigla 2loy ako nawalan ng tiwala sa babae, sa isip ko prang, ndi nlng. why wasting my time sa tao kung masasaktan ka lng kung nanjan nman lhat ng things na gusto ko gawin
and now i feel depressed after what happened, i feel like i lose all of my interest on everything, gusto ko ulet bumalik sa previous hobby ko, bkt gnun
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